My comments were written in the context of, and in reply to this statement:
“Ever since the Aziz Ansari story broke a few weeks back, there’s been lots of chatter about whether or not what happened should be considered sexual assault and/or harassment or a simple lack of communication.”
I’m saying that if a girl goes home with a guy, gets naked and into bed with him, unless she says “No”, what happens next cannot be rape. There have been multiple consents given by this point. It is OK for her to change her mind and say “No” at any point. It’s not Ok to say “No” the next day and retrospectively label it rape.
You address the other side “a simple lack of communication.” In a perfect World the chemistry of sexual attraction would survive the negotiation of detailed rules of engagement for the tryst, but this isn’t a perfect world. I just can’t see that working in a romantic dating situation.
My advise to the girl is if you go home with a guy, expect to have sex, or say “No” the earlier the better.